They call her the she-man

I didn't start parking my car at the church opposite my office until recently. Friends who did often told me about a fierce parking attendant who tells you where you can or cannot park.

Nay, she barks.

With little white hairs sticking out from her chin (not unlike one that is badly shaven) and a stout frame, she is quite an intimidating figure. Her curly dark hair in pig tails not withstanding.

Depending on her mood in the morning, she'd greet you with a scowl or plain indifference. Sometimes both.

When I started parking at the church, I didn't want to rub her up the wrong way. So I made sure to park where her gruff, authoritative voice said I should. And paid the RM3 daily fee in exact change.

I first realised she wasn't such a hard nut when I left my car lights on one day and my car battery died. With her husband (who worked there too), she helped me push my car to a spot where I could jump start it from another. Her husband cracked jokes about being a car doctor and she said it's too bad for him she's not some hot nurse in a short skirt.

Yesterday, when I walked into the car park, she suggested I apply for monthly parking. I told her I won't be working here for very much longer. I didn't intend to stay for a chat, but she asked ordered me to sit down with her for awhile. The traffic jam was really bad so I did (actually, I didn't dare to say no).

She went on to tell me a little about herself.
And I'm glad I stayed to listen.

Before her 7 years working at this car park, she worked for 16 years at the Spastic Children's Association. She took care of the swimming pool, cleaned it and looked after the kids when they were in it. It was hard work but she enjoyed it very much.

But because she spent so little time with her husband (who was already working at the car park), they were fighting alot. So she left her job and has been here, working with him, since.

She said she's bored out of her wits sitting around in the car park all day. Her only consolation is that she's working for a church. Which led us to a conversation that left me with a warm fuzzy feeling the whole night.

She: I'm Christian, you know. You Christian?

Me: Yes, I am.

She: Ya, last time ah, I very angry with God you know. He take my sister away from me. So I very angry with Him. I stopped going to temple. I was Hindu last time. But then after I met Christ ah, different you know.

Me: Really?

She: God is not fair in this world.

Me: ...

She: That's why there are rich people. There are poor people. There are middle people. So when people ask me why believe in God? Why let people suffer? Why let people we love die? Why not everybody rich and healthy and happy?

So I tell them ah, God created all of us different because... if he created all of us the same, if everybody is rich and healthy and happy, nobody will go to Him anymore. We will forget Him. Only when we have trouble only we go to Him you know.

Me: (nods my head)

She: My husband wears cross ah... but he don't really believe. He also angry with God. His sister also. Because ah, her daughter born handicap. Fell sick you know. So ah, his sister took her to all the temple also no cure. Take her to church also no cure. But then God take her away, they angry and ask God "Why?" If God really love us why He do this you know.

So I told them you all stupid. God took her away so she won't have to suffer you know. And then ah, God took her away so she won't be a burden to them. Cos not only the daughter suffer, the family suffer also. So she is with God now. No more suffering. They don't see.

Me: (speechless)...

She: So I don't bother if I rich or poor, sick or healthy. Because when we die ah, everybody is the same.

Her husband then appeared and she had to go.
So I got into my car and drove home, her words ringing in my ears.

This morning she was back to her old gruffy self.
And I felt a certain privilege that she opened up to me.

If only for those few minutes.